Our Baby Story…
“You can not get pregnant on your own”
When a doctor tells you this - you take it as bible. And here I am 17 weeks 5 days pregnant at my 3 hour Glucose test. What I’ve learned - we don’t know shit and life HAPPENS.
I share all aspects of my life and then all of a sudden in a 7 week blip we have announced a pregnancy and moved. Like WTF - yeah that’s how I feel too. The clock in the waiting room is literally ticking backwards just loudly enough to block out all the coughing so I figured NOW is the time to finally write this pregnancy story.
I’m going waaaaayyyyyyyy back (remember I have nothing but time haha) when Brian and I got married we had been together (on and off for a year or two - don’t get me started) for 7 years so we decided to pull the goalie a little after a year of marriage.
For about 5 months EVERY month I wouldn’t get my period and I’d yell “THIS IS IT WE’RE PREGNANT!!” And we weren’t. Finally Brian said “I think something might be wrong.”
I think back and my periods have always been inconsisten so truthfully I didn’t think twice of this. They were so irregular and painful since I was younger that THAT was the exact reason I GOT ON Birth Control. But yet after spending my whole life trying NOT to get pregnant - when I want to, I can’t. Life’s a bitch isn’t it?
SO although the BC helped me regulate the timing and lessening the cramps it also completely masked the fact that I didn’t ovulate - spoiler alert kinda important when you’re trying to grow a family.
After some initial tests with my gyno I was introduced to my Fertility dr - who is THE BEST. (I pray you NEVER need ANYONE in this dept BUT if you do let me know and I’ll give you his name, I’ve had a few friends use them with GREAT, adorable ;) results)
At the time I was working in the city and thank God I had flexibility because I was in that office probably every other day for 2 months. I’ll Fast Fwd the details - because unless you’re trying to conceive this infertility chat can seem like another language!
We found our winning game plan so BOTH Emerson and Cullen were conceived with Progesterone, Clomid and Ovidrel. Em worked the first time and Cullen took 3.
Now if you’re following me I’m going to assume you have gotten the feeling I’m a little “extra” in the emotional department. Well let’s talk about me on CLOMID. I’m at a 300 and my husband is a SAINT.
I’m an only child and honestly talking Brian into a second kid was HARD - I PROMISE you only child’s dreams are of siblings being the best of friends and holding hands skipping off into the proverbial distance of life TOGETHER. So I NEEDED this for Em…
And obvs I won this battle ;)
But we had one of each, we were content. And truthfully we didn’t want to go through that process again. I felt like I was SO lucky to come out of it with TWO PERFECT(ly annoying) HUMANS. It’s EXHAUSTING - mentally and physically. And it’s a FT job in itself.
So in every dr appt - I was asked about protection and I didn’t WANT to be on medicine if I was told I couldn’t get pregnant. Why voluntarily go on meds to prevent something that couldn’t happen. So I would say “I had to use fertility with both babies if it’s meant to be it’ll be the second coming of Christ” (careful what you say eh?)
Now here we are LIVING the DREAM - we’re out of diapers, we’re moving into a big boy bed and we’re seeing the thoughts of traveling and kids in SCHOOL - is this the Fountain of Youth? The thing you dream about YET also dread because well Parenting is a battle between loving the shit out of them and also strangling them.
!! Dad and Mom stop reading here...
So Mr.Parker and I were having double sleepovers like every weekend where WAY too much booze was consumed, we were having sex like it was 2002 (you know what’s up) CARE FREE parents of older kids…
George and Linda come on back…
Then the periods starting being all over the place again and Brian says “you’re pregnant.”
I’m all SHUT UP - we CAN’T get pregnant, you heard them! (insert panic and realizing my boobs are SORE?!?!)
FF to 2 tests later…
That moment is a day I will NEVER forget. I am simultaneously YELLING, CRYING & LAUGHING. I think Brian went immediately into EMT FireFighter mode because I’m sure I looked like a few too many of his patients on the ambulance than he’d care to remember BUT he consoled me and all he kept saying was “We’ll be ok.”
And you know what WE WILL BE OK. After the shock settled I literally could not be more excited. Brian on the other hand likes to throw out fun facts like “I’ll be 60 before this kids 21” and I’m 40. All I have for him is “haha - I won’t”
And those thoughts are true BUT I am OVERWHELMED when I start to think of how much we’ve been through in the past few years…
Brian’s injury & dealing with the back to work / staying home dance
Closing our family Gutter business (thanks injury)
Eventually making the decision for Bri to retire (2x)
Adjusting to a new schedule where we are both home ALL day
Switching a few different studios
Getting pregnant with Cullen
Selling our house to get “back on our feet”
Staying at my grandparents
Moving Em to a new school
Finding and buying our DREAM HOME
Like I’m tired just writing that.
BUT things seem to be leveling out… we’re getting some answers we’ve been waiting for and I *THINK* we’re almost out of the jungle - and here is this baby that says “you guys aren’t done just yet”
I mean is it weird to say I feel like we’re getting our fresh start at the ripe ol’ age of 37 and 39?
I know from every inch of my body I was put on this planet to be a mom and there was a tiny little nugget baby that CHOSE ME, CHOSE US, defied ALL the odds and is reminding us from conception that he will be the BOSS and we were NOT complete without him.
So moral of the story…
It’s Never Too Late to Live Happily Ever After
Whatever that means to you - GO FOR IT.
Find your Happily Ever After - follow your passions, ask the guy out, go back to school, drop the energy suckers - find it, love it and LIVE THE SHIT OUT OF THIS LIFE because it’s absolutely too short not to!